A Celebrity Who Teaches You How Shoplifting Is Done Right

In the corner of our kitchen stood a tall ramshackle monument of supermarket carry-baskets. Anthony and I had perfected a two-man method of shoplifting. One of us would walk through a market and fill up a carry-basket with expensive food, then walk purposefully through the store with it. When approaching the cash-registers and the entrance turnstile, the second guy would walk equally as purposefully in the opposite direction towards the exit but on the other side of the turnstile. Then a swift and flawless handoff of the basket of goods over the turnstile, the second guy exiting the store with the gourmet grub. With smooth efficiency, we perfected our timing like an Olympic event.